I have just got off a 3 hour session with BT tech support, they couldn't support my left testicle if they tried as a team. Bunch of script monkeys with tick boxes.
You see I have for the past week been having a few issues with my online gaming, One minute I am kicking ass and taking names and the next I cannot hit the side of a barn.
So after taking the advice of Zennon jedi network master I ran a little bit of software called ping plotter. It is free to download and try for 14 days to help identify network problems etc.
To get any really useful data from it you need to just let the thing run and look at the data after several hours on several occasions.
Well I went to work and let it run for 8 hours on an evening with only my PC using the interweb.
At peak time I got my usual flat line 15 MS of ping great connection but around 21.00 hours onwards I was getting massive spikes that lasted for a minute of two. When I say massive I mean a sudden increase up to 2000 MS ping.
And so began my ordeal.
08.00hrs, I call BT support and am connected to an Indian sounding lady. She explained that I needed to do a line check which I had already done. She then explained that as I was having a problem with my speed she would need to do a few checks.
I explained I was not having an issue with my speed I was having an issue with ping spikes and 50%-100% packet loss.
She ran the test. My phone line crackled and clicked for a good 4 to 5 minutes before it went dead and I got a dialing tone.
This was not looking good so I went to make a cup of tea and gave her the chance to call me back which she didn't.
08.16hrs, I call back and have to give all my personal information again to the new Indian sounding lady and explain the issue I have been having.
She explains that as I am having a problem with my speeds she will need to run some tests, I patiently explain that I am not having problems with my speeds that I am getting big ping spikes and packet loss.
The lady runs the test anyway and after a couple of minutes asks if my internet is dropping out.
I again explain that my internet is not dropping out that I am experiencing large ping spikes and packet loss.
09.11hrs rolls around and no contact so once again I call and can just hear call centre people talking in the background, after 2 minutes of this with nobody to speak to I try again and speak to another Indian lady who is tries to contact the lady I was speaking to before, I explained that she didn't know her arse from her elbow and could I please be put through to level 2 technical support as I was getting nowhere.
She agreed and put me through.
My call was now in a que and would be answered shortly.
09.34 still in a que, 09.46 still in a que,
09.48hrs, I get through to Technical support level 2 or so I thought. After giving my name address account number again I explained the problem.
The lady said that if my speeds were low they could run a test.
No shit Sherlock, We have been there before I believe and I ask what part of I am getting large ping spikes and packet loss is she having a problem understanding.
She explains that her department do not deal with things like that as they only deal with E-mail problems. What the Fuck!!!!!!
She could put me through to the department that deals with my problem and gave me the same number I had initially dialled at 08.00hrs.
I explained that they were of no help at all and so she put me through to what seemed to be an English based call centre.
An English sounding chap then ran me through all the security questions again and after I had explained to him that I was getting large ping spikes and packet loss and I could send him screen grabs of the data he asked what my speed was and could I run a speed test. FFS.
I duly ran the test and explained that the issue wasn't present at all times and after putting me on hold for 10 minutes came back and said that I need to run the test when the issue arises and let them know the results of the speed test.
I again patiently explained that by the time the issue arises in game and I have tried to run the speed test the issue has resolved itself as the test can take up to 2 minutes.
On hold again, He returned eventually to tell me that their technicians cannot do anything unless I give them the results of the speed test,
I explained that he ought to get a manager or next level person for me to speak to.
He tried to tell me that it was probably my PS4 causing the problem as they are apparently notorious for this issue.
I asked him how that could be when my PS4 was not even switched on when the problems were occurring.
He went to get a manager.
Said manager got on the phone and explained that she didn't really know much about my issue and was not even aware of what ping and latency was but would be escalating my issue to another department.
I wait with baited breath.
3 hours I will never get back.
And so internet let me leave you with these pearls of wisdom,
If you want help for an issue with BT broadband do not call bt broadband support because BT broadband support are about as much use as a fucking chocolate fireguard.
Peace out YAll, THE BAGSTAXXX