Saturday, 6 August 2011

vacuum chambers, road rage and magnets!!!


Hello again interweb, before I start ranting today I would just like to update you on the particle accelerator project. I have a particle gun salvaged from a wonderful bit of kit, and a vacuum chambers sorted. However it is proving a problem to get magnets powerful enough to make the damn thing work. You see my theory is this, If I could build one big enough it would solve the problem of attaining light speed. The main draw back being that the size and power of the magnetic field required to fire a spaceship would be so huge it would suck the fillings right out of your mouth and that dodgy piercing you thought was such a good idea may not have been such a good idea after all!!!! Anyway, onwards and upwards.

 Living at S11 at the moment is a bit like living at the Olympic village, its a fucking building site, if its not the immediate neighbours its the fekkers across the road and up the road, bloody angle grinders hammering and sawing all fekking morning but I flatly refuse to let it raise my blood pressure. I will let Karma deal with themJ
 On my way to the gym yesterday this guy in a parcel delivery van got himself in totally the wrong lane and then decided he wanted my bit of tarmac, oh dear, 2 ton of Trooper is not moving for a little parcel van. Well the ensuing interaction was the stuff of comedy genius. First off he started blowing his horn and as I looked in the rear view mirror his arms were waving and gesticulating like he was trying to land a plane or something. I panicked and checked that there was no 747 on a flight path directly towards me............. nope, whatever could be wrong with this imbecile? Next he drove along side of my vehicle and continued to gesticulate and his mouth was moving quite a lot. I looked at him and gestured that I couldn’t hear him, this seemed to make his face go very red and yet more gesticulating ensued, I couldn’t help but think of those tote people at horse racing waving their arms around like mad. I continued to the roundabout where he pulled up alongside and by this time I must confess to having a fucking huge grin on my face by now, he was almost out of his vehicle, via the window, I could see the spit flying from his now frothing mouth and I thought that maybe I should have had those rabies shots last month. Well I cannot even begin to describe the effect licking my lips, blowing him a kiss and winking at him had. There are not words that have been conjured up yet that could describe the effect it had.
The thing is, I for not one minute felt threatened, frightened or bothered, my blood pressure remained stable and I found the whole event rather amusing. I do hope the poor chap is alright because to be honest as I drove away  He was close to some sort of cardiac event.
Right then, off to remove all the magnets from the kitchen cupboard doors and then from the cupboards in the bedrooms.

Peace out yall, THE BAGSTAXXX

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